Child Behavior – Method in the Madness!
Let’s take look at child behavior. Has something like this happened to you? You are sitting at the kitchen table sorting through bills and writing checks. Everything is due and you are a bit flustered. Your gorgeous toddler is sitting up on a rug at your feet. She waves some blocks at you and says “Mommy play?” You smile and say “In a minute” and keep doing your paper work. She tries again, and again. Each time you smile but keep sorting through your papers. Finally a block hits you on the side of the head and you look up, startled, to find your gorgeous child smiling innocently. Does she know what she is doing? Well, sort of. She doesn’t want you to be a screaming ogre (unless it’s entertaining to watch), but she does want you. All children do. And if it’s an angry ‘you’, then that is better than no ‘you’ at all. A major problem with most child behavior is that what parents need and expect, and what kids need and can actually do, are often poles apart. If child discipline can take into account our children’s natural behavior it can be less stressful for everyone. Adults and children have different ideas on everything from sleep problems and the joys of toilet training, to whether the cat should be washed in the toilet or how much attention your child really needs. We can model our child discipline more effectively once we understand why our children are behaving the way that they are. 7 Common Reasons Why Children MisbehaveThey are too young to know how they should be behaving.It takes a while to learn all the complex steps that make up the rules on how to behave. Expect to have to repeat your instructions often. Busy young children have short attention spans and short memories.They are trying to express how they are feeling.It can be hard enough for an adult to find the words to express how they feel sometimes. Put yourself in your kid’s shoes – they can be completely overwhelmed by a whole range of emotions in a short amount of time. If they are upset, angry, or frustrated it may all spill out as a tantrum or violent rampage through the house.Children want (and need) lots of attention.If they feel they aren’t getting enough they will find ways of getting it even if it isn’t high quality attention. For example they can be hurt and angry that your Saturday ritual of reading the papers over a coffee doesn’t include them.Expect to be interrupted by more and more urgent requests, toys plonked on the paper and finally the papers ripped from under your nose. Children like to copy mum and dad.Finding mud smeared all over the back door may be you child’s attempt at painting the house just like daddy. Finding all the clothes from your wardrobe in a crumpled heap may be part of your child busily getting ready to go to work just like you.Try to be gentle and get them to help put it all back again. Stress can affect children too.
If there is something major happening in your lives it can bring on some pretty horrendous behavior just when you feel least able to cope with it.
What’s the point in being good?They may feel good behavior doesn’t bring any good results. Make sure isn’t just bad behavior that gets attentionNot fair!They may feel that you have been unfair and “act out” against you. Make sure you stick to your own rules. Take the time to reassess your rules as your children grow up as they may feel that the current rules are for babies and too strict.In summaryWe can say that child behavior centers on the needs of children and parents being at crossed purposes. They have a need for constant attention and an inability to cope with the world around them.That’s always where parents come in. We’re the ones that guide our children and love them. When you are worried about child behavior problems a child psychologist can help. It is never a failure to ask for help. It is part of caring for the wellbeing of your family. Good advice never goes astray. If you have any stories you’d like to share about child behavior,
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